I went to my pre-op appointment. I had no idea what to expect but it wasn't bad. I had to go to the registration area and meet with a lady who gave me paperwork about my rights, what to expect in terms of what the bill looks like (like literally looks like, a photo of an example), a booklet with a lot of topics such as T.V, Housekeeping, Espresso Cart (I wish!! but no), ah what else...meal hours, things like that. I was given my advanced directive to fill out. That was pretty much it.
I was sent upstairs to another floor to wait in the pre-op room to meet with the pre-op nurse. She seemed a little busy, even though there was only one other person ahead of me. I thought she might be a little intense, you know? Just a job, no personality. However, once I got into the room with her she was really nice, asked me if I was excited, I gave my normal answer which is basically yes and no, that I'm trying to take it very seriously (you know, not get my hopes way up and spaz out about it, I'm not sure why, I think this is a protective measure, like a defense barrier in my head) and she said yes, but am I excited about losing weight and I said big time.
She asked me a lot of questions. Family history, drug use, do I drink, smoke, etc. She said I was pretty easy because all my answers were no.
I was given a list of things not to do. Do not drink after midnight on Sunday, not even water Leave all jewelry at home. Wear clean, comfy clothes. Showing the morning of surgery because (other than the obvious) it helps the skin heal and increases comfort level. I am also to leave my bag in the car for the first day because I wont get assigned a room until the next day.
About the op - I'll get a breathing tube, so my throat will be scratchy or sore possibly. Ill be woken up by the staff. Ill have a pain button. If the pain does not go away then I need to let them know.
Really that was all. Paperwork, some side notes.
I think Ill make one more post before I go in, probably about the liquid diet and such. That should be it.
Friday, December 5, 2008
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Pre-Op #1
A couple days ago I had my pre-op with my surgeon. I had read that sometimes people have to attend a pre-op class, and I was wondering how that would be. However, I arrived to find its just a one-on-one. The $2,995 fee was also due and paid. Some papers had to be signed. Basically one said I so-and-so allow so-and-so and others to perform gastric bypass on me, etc. Also I had to read over the complete list of complications. WOW. I know there are so many, and they vary from person to person. I went down the first page (NOTE: I found it so funny that DEATH wasn't the first risk, it was near the bottom) I was ready to sign, I turned the next page..the list continued! More risks all the way down the page, I turned the next page and it was filled with complications too! The final page was for me to sign, and I did.
I waited a little bit before being called in. Waited in the room for a bit before the Nut. came in.
She asked if I had any questions, I said no, she said I lost another two pounds. There was really nothing to talk about. She did in fact say I would have to drink a tiny bottle of laxative the day before surgery. That's not so bad after I've heard horror stories about people having to drink a jug or more of the stuff.
Also I don't have to go on the two week/one week liquid diet like most people have to. Mine lasts for one day. That's not bad at all. My surgery is at 10am, so I should have to be at the hospital at around 7am. At least the sun will be up and it wont be all scary. She listened to my lungs and such for a minute before showing me again where the cuts will be.
There wasn't really anything to talk about. I didn't have any questions. I've been on forums and reading personal stories/accounts for more than three months now. I feel like I know too much, which may be good later to post about, just the facts of what I learned.
I'll go into surgery around 10am (Ive heard horror stories about waiting a long time so who knows). I don't know what tests I will be getting before that. That day I think she said I wouldn't eat or drink anything. She said my goal for that day will be to walk by later in the afternoon. She said that the next day I'll get something to drink, walk around a bit and if I feel better the next day Ill go home.
She said she would bring my surgeon in to say hi (lmao, just the way she said it was funny). It took about 15-20 minutes for my surgeon to come in, always cheerful and positive. She's really a blast. She said I am very healthy (other than being overweight I suppose) and very young so I should be up and around in no time. She's so nice. She said I am expected to be one of their big success stories and probably one of the people they would ask to attend and speak at a seminar that people attend when they're wondering about WLS. It was nice to hear.
The girls at my surgeon's office are so kind and sweet. It's not faked or forced either, it's so natural. The visit itself was basically over, I checked out, got my post-op visit date and also a sheet to get blood taken which I finished later that same day. I didn't have to fast for that blood test, weird huh!
I need to fix my countdown timer now that I know my surgery "time". Right now I have it set just for midnight of the 8th. So Ill try to get that done now I suppose.
Nothing left to update on, have my next pre-op on the 4th, at the hospital. I register and such there, find out what tests I have to take and all that fun stuff.
I waited a little bit before being called in. Waited in the room for a bit before the Nut. came in.
She asked if I had any questions, I said no, she said I lost another two pounds. There was really nothing to talk about. She did in fact say I would have to drink a tiny bottle of laxative the day before surgery. That's not so bad after I've heard horror stories about people having to drink a jug or more of the stuff.
Also I don't have to go on the two week/one week liquid diet like most people have to. Mine lasts for one day. That's not bad at all. My surgery is at 10am, so I should have to be at the hospital at around 7am. At least the sun will be up and it wont be all scary. She listened to my lungs and such for a minute before showing me again where the cuts will be.
There wasn't really anything to talk about. I didn't have any questions. I've been on forums and reading personal stories/accounts for more than three months now. I feel like I know too much, which may be good later to post about, just the facts of what I learned.
I'll go into surgery around 10am (Ive heard horror stories about waiting a long time so who knows). I don't know what tests I will be getting before that. That day I think she said I wouldn't eat or drink anything. She said my goal for that day will be to walk by later in the afternoon. She said that the next day I'll get something to drink, walk around a bit and if I feel better the next day Ill go home.
She said she would bring my surgeon in to say hi (lmao, just the way she said it was funny). It took about 15-20 minutes for my surgeon to come in, always cheerful and positive. She's really a blast. She said I am very healthy (other than being overweight I suppose) and very young so I should be up and around in no time. She's so nice. She said I am expected to be one of their big success stories and probably one of the people they would ask to attend and speak at a seminar that people attend when they're wondering about WLS. It was nice to hear.
The girls at my surgeon's office are so kind and sweet. It's not faked or forced either, it's so natural. The visit itself was basically over, I checked out, got my post-op visit date and also a sheet to get blood taken which I finished later that same day. I didn't have to fast for that blood test, weird huh!
I need to fix my countdown timer now that I know my surgery "time". Right now I have it set just for midnight of the 8th. So Ill try to get that done now I suppose.
Nothing left to update on, have my next pre-op on the 4th, at the hospital. I register and such there, find out what tests I have to take and all that fun stuff.
Friday, November 21, 2008
Post Pre-Op Pre-Op
Eek, got the call today from the hospital that I have a pre-op appointment over there, after my pre-op with my surgeon. Wonder what that will be like? My first pre-op is on Monday, the 24th. The second one, at the hospital with the nurse is on December 4th.
The List
The big list of to-dos slowly unfolded by the time I was sent off to a surgeon. With my insurance I would need the following.
- A chest X-Ray
- A Psych Exam
- Abdominal Ultrasound
- EKG
- Blood Tests
- Diet Program (This was not required for me, however I know its not uncomming for others.)
- Nutritionist's Report
Not in that order, any order really. But first, I had to meet the surgeon. I was told to call one surgeon, but I found out he was not covered by my insurance. My insurance requires the facility be a facility of excellence. So I was sent to another doctor. After calling her office I found out I had to attend a seminar about weight loss surgery. I think this was back in July...gosh I cant remember.
I attended with my dad who appeared to be very interested. When the surgeon said that people with my current weight/BMI and age will die 20 years sooner than they should if based on current health. She explained everything about the lap band and gastic bypass. She showed many charts, and a 3D movie showing how the bypass and band are performed.
By this time I had already been researching the lap band and the bypass and I found that since the bypass changes your insides in such a drastic way, it does drastic things. There are too many to describe here, but one big one is it can cure and forever prevent diabetes. Amazing, no? It cures it. Forever. They now even do something called a mini-bypass to cure diabetes.
I knew that I needed a lot of help, not just a little, the band was not for me. However, I noticed almost everything was more interested in the band. This is because the recovery time is much less, half actually, and it costs...about half.
Well this is funny. There was a weight loss ad on right this second as Im typing this. Ive seen it before, maybe you have too. This guy claims to be a bariatric surgeon...yet he is promoting his "fullbar" instead of surgery. Say wha? You eat the bar, drink some water, wait half an hour and eat and he says it has the same effect as surgery. Then they show a skinny, older blonde eating the bar then pushing her plate of food away. Why talk about surgery made for the morbidly obese...then show a skinny, healthy model? Sigh. They really do love playing off peoples' fears an hopes at the same time.
That was the list. It took a little over a month to get everything done. Lots of tests. It could have been worse...with other insurance companies you have to write appeal letters. I never had to. After my psych. eval report came back to my surgeon, and I met with her nutritionist I got my approval call in about a week. It was very simple compared to the things other people have to go through.
By this time I was 275 or so.
I have yet to meet with my surgeon again. In fact, after I got my phone call with my date (first week of December) at the very same time I was set to meet with my surgeon for my pre-op appointment. This monday in fact. I got my date a month ago I think actually. I remember saying to myself I have one month and two weeks to go. Now? I have two weeks until the big day.
It feels a bit strange. I keep thinking maybe something will go wrong. Maybe theyll move it, or it'll get canceled or Ill get a cold or something at the last minute (I havent been sick in five years, not even a cold), its been known to happen.
Until Monday then!
The Bypass Idea - Starting the Journey
The idea for the bypass isn't and wasn't something that just came up one day and I decided on it. My mom mentioned it once or twice in the past few years. Mostly in passing comments like "you should check into the lap band or bypass". Just comments like those, nothing too dramatic just an idea. That is where I consider the starting point to be, usually around those comments. Its like turning on to a long stretch of road and you know theres something amazing down at the end, but you squint real hard trying to see how much the road twists or how far the road goes...you just don't know. Its a lost and awkward feeling. Another feeling I had was when the weight loss surgery ads started appearing on TV. I looked at those thinking it must be some long, strange process and I wouldn't even know where to start...I thought "it was not something I could do" and I don't mean that I couldn't go through surgery or its too scary or too hard, it just seems like some strange big thing that I probably could never reach and grasp.
How did it start then? Well about a year ago I had a blood test, my doctor has tested me twice...I think he was just waiting and watching for me to get diabetes, and my thyroid level looked a bit low. He sent me home to do the temp test. I actually slacked for a few months...early into this year. I forgot all about the temp test. (If you're curious you can google thyroid temp test, its a common thing done on top of blood tests to figure out thyroid problems.). Finally I do the temp test and my body temp was a little bit low, which confirmed hypothyroidism. I started taking thyroids around May or June, I really can't recall now.
It was when I went back for a check-up that my doctor suggested I start some diet or diet program. He had not known that, like most others in this situation, I have been on almost every diet...with the exception of the "fad diets" like weight watchers (not bashing them just saying its a business, with a good support group) south beach, jenny, etc. I have been on the more common diets, working out, eating salad, veggies, meats. I've been on the low/no carb diet, the eat six tiny meals a day diet, the eat three normal meals a day diet, the low fat diet, the no fat diet, the low cal diet, the no cal diet....since I was about ten years old. My parents never handled the diets well, treated me like a criminal. I was a kid, I didn't know about being healthy and as I got older it just really went away and I ate whatever I wanted. I was always to be the token fat person in our family.
I asked him about weight loss surgery. We talked a bit about my past diets and such and then I dropped the critical detail which I just found out recently at that time. I'm 22 years old, I'm under my family's insurance, at 23 years old I will no longer be covered. That means by early next year '09, I wont have insurance. As of right now I have the best insurance you can get in California at the moment. So we got the ball rolling right then and there. I was sent off to another doctor who focuses on weight management. He is a famous guy around here, always on the news talking about weight and health.
I met with him and he started me on a protein diet. I was to meet with him every month. I believe my first appointment was in June. I also was to walk half an hour on the treadmill every other day. I did good for the first month or so. I was very pumped, just excited that while I was working on this program that my new doctor was working on finding me a surgeon.
At the next check-up appointment I lost a handful of pounds and while its not a huge amount (5 pounds or so in a month) I was getting healthy and I realized that even if its one pound a month (which has happened) its still a loss. Im not gaining anymore.
Later I was to start the "checking off" process.
When I first started this journey I was 289 pounds. I should be 160-180 pounds.
How did it start then? Well about a year ago I had a blood test, my doctor has tested me twice...I think he was just waiting and watching for me to get diabetes, and my thyroid level looked a bit low. He sent me home to do the temp test. I actually slacked for a few months...early into this year. I forgot all about the temp test. (If you're curious you can google thyroid temp test, its a common thing done on top of blood tests to figure out thyroid problems.). Finally I do the temp test and my body temp was a little bit low, which confirmed hypothyroidism. I started taking thyroids around May or June, I really can't recall now.
It was when I went back for a check-up that my doctor suggested I start some diet or diet program. He had not known that, like most others in this situation, I have been on almost every diet...with the exception of the "fad diets" like weight watchers (not bashing them just saying its a business, with a good support group) south beach, jenny, etc. I have been on the more common diets, working out, eating salad, veggies, meats. I've been on the low/no carb diet, the eat six tiny meals a day diet, the eat three normal meals a day diet, the low fat diet, the no fat diet, the low cal diet, the no cal diet....since I was about ten years old. My parents never handled the diets well, treated me like a criminal. I was a kid, I didn't know about being healthy and as I got older it just really went away and I ate whatever I wanted. I was always to be the token fat person in our family.
I asked him about weight loss surgery. We talked a bit about my past diets and such and then I dropped the critical detail which I just found out recently at that time. I'm 22 years old, I'm under my family's insurance, at 23 years old I will no longer be covered. That means by early next year '09, I wont have insurance. As of right now I have the best insurance you can get in California at the moment. So we got the ball rolling right then and there. I was sent off to another doctor who focuses on weight management. He is a famous guy around here, always on the news talking about weight and health.
I met with him and he started me on a protein diet. I was to meet with him every month. I believe my first appointment was in June. I also was to walk half an hour on the treadmill every other day. I did good for the first month or so. I was very pumped, just excited that while I was working on this program that my new doctor was working on finding me a surgeon.
At the next check-up appointment I lost a handful of pounds and while its not a huge amount (5 pounds or so in a month) I was getting healthy and I realized that even if its one pound a month (which has happened) its still a loss. Im not gaining anymore.
Later I was to start the "checking off" process.
When I first started this journey I was 289 pounds. I should be 160-180 pounds.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
The Easy Way Out
For all those who are in my shoes, or have been in the past...Don't you hate that phase; The Easy Way Out? I sure do. Our lives are nothing but easy. We struggle physically and mentally. Those who torment us and put us down see their insults and disrespect as our punishment for being overweight in the first place. Even after weight loss surgery (WLS) we can be looked upon as impostors of the skinny world, though I wonder if they notice we are too thrilled with our new lives to really notice their scowls.
Perhaps this all sounds negative, like a mass rant but really its not. It's just how things are right now. Even people in the WLS community look down upon its own. That post Ill get to later on. For now, we're talking about the (anything but) easy way out. Weight Loss Surgery.
For those of us who are overweight our whole lives ((raises hand)) nothing is easy from the start. Each and every day our imperfections are pointed out to us. When we're younger, sitting at the table, eyeing a piece of food wondering if the family around us will judge us if we take another serving. Or when we go clothes shopping with our parents, and standing under those "big girls/boys" signs or having our parents yell across to us "try to find this in MegaSuperWideXXX". We get stomped on in so many ways...its very difficult to list them all.
Some that I have spoken with agree with me when I say that sometimes getting stomped on doesn't seem so bad when you consider the result. We become very kind, honest and trusting people. In some ways it is weird and awkward, in others its just nice to know that we are good people.
For example...I have never been on a date, been asked out on one. Put any one word out there and I can put a never before it. The thought that I have never had a boyfriend is a bit strange to me, but not saddening. I find that the more I stand outside, the more clearly I see. I see the problems with most relationships all around me, to the point where I am sure with some effort that I can avoid them. It is a very lucky thing that I do not crave attention - that I prefer my own company above most others. If I didn't...I would be very troubled indeed.
See how things just aren't easy? For the healthy girls and boys, who know what its like to love someone and be loved by someone, to feel free in their surroundings...to say that we are taking the easy way out is just another way to be disrespectful and insulting.
We will deal with this all our lives. It never goes away. EVER. We may lose all the weight, yes, ALL of it and become beautiful in our clothes, but inside it will all be the same. Its called the Fat Mentality, where we look in the mirror and see the same fat person we saw before our weight loss.
We wont suffer all the way though. The journey itself, while stressful, is so much fun. Checking off each little requirement on our lists until we can say "I HAVE A DATE!" and no that doesn't mean we're going out. It means we have the date of our Second Birthdays. We will be reborn into something else, and with time, change completely.
This is not the easy way out, but after all of our work...we deserve it.
Perhaps this all sounds negative, like a mass rant but really its not. It's just how things are right now. Even people in the WLS community look down upon its own. That post Ill get to later on. For now, we're talking about the (anything but) easy way out. Weight Loss Surgery.
For those of us who are overweight our whole lives ((raises hand)) nothing is easy from the start. Each and every day our imperfections are pointed out to us. When we're younger, sitting at the table, eyeing a piece of food wondering if the family around us will judge us if we take another serving. Or when we go clothes shopping with our parents, and standing under those "big girls/boys" signs or having our parents yell across to us "try to find this in MegaSuperWideXXX". We get stomped on in so many ways...its very difficult to list them all.
Some that I have spoken with agree with me when I say that sometimes getting stomped on doesn't seem so bad when you consider the result. We become very kind, honest and trusting people. In some ways it is weird and awkward, in others its just nice to know that we are good people.
For example...I have never been on a date, been asked out on one. Put any one word out there and I can put a never before it. The thought that I have never had a boyfriend is a bit strange to me, but not saddening. I find that the more I stand outside, the more clearly I see. I see the problems with most relationships all around me, to the point where I am sure with some effort that I can avoid them. It is a very lucky thing that I do not crave attention - that I prefer my own company above most others. If I didn't...I would be very troubled indeed.
See how things just aren't easy? For the healthy girls and boys, who know what its like to love someone and be loved by someone, to feel free in their surroundings...to say that we are taking the easy way out is just another way to be disrespectful and insulting.
We will deal with this all our lives. It never goes away. EVER. We may lose all the weight, yes, ALL of it and become beautiful in our clothes, but inside it will all be the same. Its called the Fat Mentality, where we look in the mirror and see the same fat person we saw before our weight loss.
We wont suffer all the way though. The journey itself, while stressful, is so much fun. Checking off each little requirement on our lists until we can say "I HAVE A DATE!" and no that doesn't mean we're going out. It means we have the date of our Second Birthdays. We will be reborn into something else, and with time, change completely.
This is not the easy way out, but after all of our work...we deserve it.
The Fabled First Post
Well here it is, and here I am. My name is Kat and I'm from California (obviously.). I am twenty-two years old, college graduate, and currently unemployed. Why? I'm waiting for something quite drastic to happen in about two weeks. It's really the focus of this blog, of everything in my life at this moment. I'm in line to have gastric bypass surgery. It will be in the first week of December.
That is what this blog is about. This has been such a long road, a road only understood by those who have traveled it, or who are currently traveling it. For someone on the outside, you can never truly understand. Being obese is becoming more and more common in our country, yet most of us try to hide from it all I've noticed. We withdraw into ourselves and keep a tight barrier around the whole subject. I broke my barrier recently around the end of June, when I suggested to my doctor that I was interested in weight loss surgery.
I have *always* been overweight. The reasons that people come up with are usually the same; being lazy, eating too much, not moving around, wont stop eating and things like that. Note...that the people coming up with these reasons have never been obese. They don't know what its like to digest food different, to have the chemicals in the brain process hunger differently, or simply to struggle with the fact that our bodies are dying from it.
I was one of the people who did not believe that obesity was a genetic disorder, or even a disease, until my surgeon explained that obesity is pretty much the mirror disease of anorexia. Think of it this way folks...no healthy living organism on this Earth wants to willingly kill itself. A person who does drugs knows it may kill him, that's its rotting his teeth or poisoning his blood...he knows, but its the addiction, the part in the brain that can't handle not having that drug. Food is the same way, you hear of people even over one thousand pounds...no one is happy like that, the body itself is near death, no healthy person willingly wants to kill themselves like that. Perhaps that's not the best way of explaining it, but if you move the pieces around you may start to see the big picture. Being morbidly obese is the result of food addiction. Sadly people like me have been ridiculed so much throughout time that the disorder itself, and the treatment are being ridiculed.
People say (note, yet again, the ones who say the following are not obese) that weight loss surgery is the easy way out. We don't have to work to lose weight, we just sit and eat as much as our new tiny stomach allows us. If we simply stop eating we will lose weight, gosh why can't we just stop? Those two subjects are what medical professionals scoff at. 1) The weight loss surgery journey is one of the longest, most stressful, and most costly experiences. 2) After surgery we have to work our entire lives just to maintain a healthy weight. We will never be perfect, our skin will sad, we will have scars and stretch marks, and we will always have the "fat person" brain which tells us we're still fat and subject to ridicule. 3) When a person stops eating, the body believes its being starved, so it goes into survival mode, locking down everything even the fat. You cannot lose weight by simply not eating, unless you don't eat for many days, and then you are doing nothing but ripping the nutrients from your body and causing muscle loss.
So there's it all in a nutshell, one Ill likely crack open later in other blogs to pick apart.
That is what this blog is about. This has been such a long road, a road only understood by those who have traveled it, or who are currently traveling it. For someone on the outside, you can never truly understand. Being obese is becoming more and more common in our country, yet most of us try to hide from it all I've noticed. We withdraw into ourselves and keep a tight barrier around the whole subject. I broke my barrier recently around the end of June, when I suggested to my doctor that I was interested in weight loss surgery.
I have *always* been overweight. The reasons that people come up with are usually the same; being lazy, eating too much, not moving around, wont stop eating and things like that. Note...that the people coming up with these reasons have never been obese. They don't know what its like to digest food different, to have the chemicals in the brain process hunger differently, or simply to struggle with the fact that our bodies are dying from it.
I was one of the people who did not believe that obesity was a genetic disorder, or even a disease, until my surgeon explained that obesity is pretty much the mirror disease of anorexia. Think of it this way folks...no healthy living organism on this Earth wants to willingly kill itself. A person who does drugs knows it may kill him, that's its rotting his teeth or poisoning his blood...he knows, but its the addiction, the part in the brain that can't handle not having that drug. Food is the same way, you hear of people even over one thousand pounds...no one is happy like that, the body itself is near death, no healthy person willingly wants to kill themselves like that. Perhaps that's not the best way of explaining it, but if you move the pieces around you may start to see the big picture. Being morbidly obese is the result of food addiction. Sadly people like me have been ridiculed so much throughout time that the disorder itself, and the treatment are being ridiculed.
People say (note, yet again, the ones who say the following are not obese) that weight loss surgery is the easy way out. We don't have to work to lose weight, we just sit and eat as much as our new tiny stomach allows us. If we simply stop eating we will lose weight, gosh why can't we just stop? Those two subjects are what medical professionals scoff at. 1) The weight loss surgery journey is one of the longest, most stressful, and most costly experiences. 2) After surgery we have to work our entire lives just to maintain a healthy weight. We will never be perfect, our skin will sad, we will have scars and stretch marks, and we will always have the "fat person" brain which tells us we're still fat and subject to ridicule. 3) When a person stops eating, the body believes its being starved, so it goes into survival mode, locking down everything even the fat. You cannot lose weight by simply not eating, unless you don't eat for many days, and then you are doing nothing but ripping the nutrients from your body and causing muscle loss.
So there's it all in a nutshell, one Ill likely crack open later in other blogs to pick apart.
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