The Easy Way Out

For all those who are in my shoes, or have been in the past...Don't you hate that phase; The Easy Way Out? I sure do. Our lives are nothing but easy. We struggle physically and mentally. Those who torment us and put us down see their insults and disrespect as our punishment for being overweight in the first place. Even after weight loss surgery (WLS) we can be looked upon as impostors of the skinny world, though I wonder if they notice we are too thrilled with our new lives to really notice their scowls.

Perhaps this all sounds negative, like a mass rant but really its not. It's just how things are right now. Even people in the WLS community look down upon its own. That post Ill get to later on. For now, we're talking about the (anything but) easy way out. Weight Loss Surgery.

For those of us who are overweight our whole lives ((raises hand)) nothing is easy from the start. Each and every day our imperfections are pointed out to us. When we're younger, sitting at the table, eyeing a piece of food wondering if the family around us will judge us if we take another serving. Or when we go clothes shopping with our parents, and standing under those "big girls/boys" signs or having our parents yell across to us "try to find this in MegaSuperWideXXX". We get stomped on in so many ways...its very difficult to list them all.

Some that I have spoken with agree with me when I say that sometimes getting stomped on doesn't seem so bad when you consider the result. We become very kind, honest and trusting people. In some ways it is weird and awkward, in others its just nice to know that we are good people.

For example...I have never been on a date, been asked out on one. Put any one word out there and I can put a never before it. The thought that I have never had a boyfriend is a bit strange to me, but not saddening. I find that the more I stand outside, the more clearly I see. I see the problems with most relationships all around me, to the point where I am sure with some effort that I can avoid them. It is a very lucky thing that I do not crave attention - that I prefer my own company above most others. If I didn't...I would be very troubled indeed.

See how things just aren't easy? For the healthy girls and boys, who know what its like to love someone and be loved by someone, to feel free in their surroundings...to say that we are taking the easy way out is just another way to be disrespectful and insulting.

We will deal with this all our lives. It never goes away. EVER. We may lose all the weight, yes, ALL of it and become beautiful in our clothes, but inside it will all be the same. Its called the Fat Mentality, where we look in the mirror and see the same fat person we saw before our weight loss.

We wont suffer all the way though. The journey itself, while stressful, is so much fun. Checking off each little requirement on our lists until we can say "I HAVE A DATE!" and no that doesn't mean we're going out. It means we have the date of our Second Birthdays. We will be reborn into something else, and with time, change completely.

This is not the easy way out, but after all of our work...we deserve it.